I covered the basicsa while back, but I see guys make the same few mistakes every time, so let's get them out in the open.
Things not to say if you want to start conversation
- Hello.
OK, you can say "hello," but don't stop there. My response to "hello" is, to no one's surprise, "Hello." This is followed by "how are you," but no one really cares how I am, so unless I deliberately respond with "oh, everything sucks," the topic dies right there. But chances are if I wanted to talk about my problems, I'd already be doing it.
I mean, be friendly and everything, but "hello" is not some magic key that unlocks conversation in other people that they were dying to start. - Why isn't anyone talking?
Because no one's said anything that they can respond to. I have nothing to say about why other people aren't talking, and neither does anyone else. Talk about something real and you'll have better luck. - Does/is anyone …
I'm not everyone, so unless you ask a question I can answer affirmatively, I'm staying silent. "Does anyone know a good place to eat?" Well, my tastes are probably different from yours (and I have dietary restrictions), so no. "Does anyone know where all the fun is?" If I did, I probably wouldn't be chatting.
Now, if you ask me where I would choose to eat, and why, I'll probably answer that because I can. This isn't to say I know everything, it's to say that if you want a question answered, ask someone, not anyone. Find someone who's talking, or who's just entered the room, and ask him. If others chime in, all the better.
It's basically all the same stuff as I said 18 months ago—talk about something and people will usually respond, if they're paying attention at all. Talk about nothing and you'll get nothing in return.
